26. exchanges with an alien

Oct 2, 2022, 3:09 PM

Hello my love. I'm so glad you picked up my call. I've felt so hopeless not having any access to you, not knowing how you're doing, whether you're safe or not.

We're not allowed to do this ever again, the whole cutting each other out of our lives. It's no good for either of us, we've learned this lesson twice now. The universe is gonna kick our ass if we make her teach it to us one more time!!!!! And I know neither of us took it seriously. I always knew you'd come back when you were ready. But we can't even pretend to do it again. I shouldn't have let you go so easily. I should've fought for you. I thought what you were saying was "I need space to handle this on my own" but I know now that you were reaching for a helping hand. I wish I knew then, what I know now. But we can't know what we don't know. You taught me that.

It's been so dark having to think about you without being able to talk to you. I went to the bottom looking for you but I couldn't see you. You were still hiding from the sharks of the world. Like an octopus burrowing itself in seashells.



I talked to your mom a few weeks ago and she gave me an update on everything. She told me how you were saying that "some guy Grant offered you a job through mental telepathy, MENTAL. TELEPATHY!" she said. And I just laughed to myself because I had been trying to communicate with you through mental telepathy for weeksssssss at that point and some guy "Grant" got through and I didn't. Lmfao.

Also, one time when I called the ward the lady asked me what my relation was to you and I said "I'm her best friend" and I could hear her roll her eyes when she responded "her best friend?" as if best friends were for children. And I was like YEAH, BITCH. I SAID WHAT I SAID.

Anyway, isn't it crazy that this time in your life is one day going to just be a blip on the map? In 5 years these 5 months will feel like nothing. This is just a few pages of the story of your life. It wouldn't have happened if it wasn't meant to happen. When your parents texted me that you were missing in *** ***** my first thought was "she just HAD to touch the bottom. she just couldn't help herself." You had to do it. You had to go there. And for those reasons, I know it has a purpose because the deeper we go, the darker we see, the higher we will go, the lighter we will see. Everything that comes in, must go out. Energy received is energy given.

Everything you've felt, everything you've seen - turn it into art. We'll call it Visions in a Psych Ward. We'll sell the shit out of it any way we can - Etsy, Instagram, the boardwalk in Santa Monica. We'll get it into a gallery space. And we'll get you back on track. We'll rebuild everything you had. If you need money for supplies I will give it to you.

And while you're doing that don't forget to draw all the houses and buildings you've dreamt of, without the pressure of a high-stress job. Those will become your portfolio for your next job. You're a visionary. Why do you think everyone at ******* was so obsessed with you? You can see things no one else can. You can dream of the most incredible notions of architecture. You're going to get back on that track. We must stay the course. Your dreams aren't as far away as they feel right now but we have to get you healthy.

You have to take back your mind. The same way you boss around people in your life, boss around your mind. Tell your mind you need it to be strong. You need it to follow through with its promises to keep you safe. You need it to form healthy habits. Tell your mind what you want from it so that it can give it to you.

As soon as you're well enough, come to LA. I have shelter and food waiting for you. I'm here to support you get through this. You can repay me by designing my first house.

I love you soo much.
I will be in Maryland on October 22nd and I want to see you for however brief of a time.

X, M ❤️



Oct 14, 2022, 2:56 PM

this is going to take me awhile to read

my email style is one or two words followed by

best,

hang tight.

glad american men arent making the cut.

i feel dry by the sight of a non nba player wearing an nba jersey.

im sure you can relate. that is where i stopped

best,

x x x x x x



Oct 14, 2022, 2:59 PM

i question why anybody thinks im unsafe

always safe in my own body.

never worry.

enough wit and rage to swindle my way out into safety, always.

happy we are conversing again. missed your mannerisms.

are you still in La?

will respond with each paragraph. i am easily overwhelmed.

hang tight.

best,

x x x x x x

P.S.

keeping you in sPam.

less minutia to filter through.